Sweet Tattoo

Back in the day when Dr. Ding worked in prison, she was duly impressed by the variety and workmanship of tattoos therein beheld. Since that time, she’s been obssessed with getting a tattoo, but hasn’t been able to decide on a design.

Tattooing goes back many thousands of years and is a pan-cultural phenomenon. Its purposes are many, but one of the most ancient is to ensure that at the time of death, the Powers That Be can identify the spirit of the deceased by his or her tattoo markings which basically signify something like “This End Up” to whatever divine being was to swoop down from the heavens and carry the spirit from the human body along its journey to the afterlife or, alternatively and perhaps stereotypically, to the nearest Ozzfest.

I particularly like the idea of this new form of tattooing that is luminescent, as pictured above. For my 40th birthday, perhaps I will gift myself with a clutch of stars along my right arm, from my shoulder down to my fingertips. Then, if I can’t sleep at night I can just wave my arm around and watch the stars dance. Doesn’t that sound at once entertaining and practical? And just a wee bit fanciful for a hard-bitten shrink? And maybe quite expensive? That’s why it’s just an idea still.

I also like the idea of having a tattoo that is invisible except when I want it to emerge, but I’ve just been told that this technology doesn’t exist yet, so I’m going to have to wait.

My biggest concern: being 88 years old, wishing I hadn’t gotten a giant purple psychedelic dolphin tattooed down one thigh.

Then again, it might be worse to be 88 years old and never have done anything so foolish and daring.